MuddleLand

Straighten up and fly right...

2005-10-30T19:39:00.000-08:00

This country’s going to the dogs and no one’s doing a thing to stop it. Yes of course the politicians and the army are responsible for a great deal of the chaos but so is everyone else.

Even if we’re not willing to get on the roads and protest lack of law and order etc. we should at least take personal responsibility for our actions and that means everything….Everything. Don’t run a red light, don’t bribe the cops, don’t pee out in the open, don’t jump the queue and oh! Don’t leave abusive comments on someone else’s blog – that’s just bad manners.

It’s because we lack discipline in the small things that the big stuff is allowed to get so ridiculously out of hand. Once that's sorted, other things will start to fall into place. Maybe then, Sri Lankans will develop a better sense of time and decorum and will also learn to respect one another’s individuality and privacy.

There’s still a long way to go though.

Why, WHY, wHY I'm voting for Ranil

2005-10-26T22:41:00.000-07:00

Why I’m voting for Ranil

No I haven’t sold my blog to the UNP electioneering machinery, so this is not an Ranil -ass-kiss write up. Read on.

Basically the way I see it: the JVP in government wielding their hefty political theories will in fact take this stupendously beautiful country back about fifty to sixty years in terms of development. Why so much time? Well, because there will be more in-fighting in government than there is now (if you believe that to be possible), more ad-hoc policies implemented and worst of worst possible scenarios – Mahinda’s government will (will, not maybe, not might but will) split this country on racial lines and that will bugger the deal for all of us, whether we're in the minorities or not.

Enough of this war. I frankly don’t care what happens to Jaffna, I’ve only been there once in my life anyway and beautiful as to was I am never going back until this thing is settled once and for all. It doesn’t bother me that I might need a visa to go to Trinco or to Arugam Bay. Give it up already. If successive governments can’t and won’t fight the Tigers on their terms, then they must cease hostilities and talk the issue through.

Mahinda’s coalition government is likely to do the following (in my opinion)

1. Have the most illogical economic policies on God’s earth – coalition governments have a bad track record in this part of the world
2. Tackle the tigers with no finesse and end up pushing us back into war
3. Push the Minority issues to the bottom of the list and irritate the average Tamil, Muslim and Burgher no end
4. Make Sinhalese the official language and insist we all speak it – even when we’re talking to ourselves
5. Chase most of the reasonably bright and reasonably well-educated people out of this country
6. Corruption will continue unabated and the population will see no improvement in their lot
7. Fewer journalists have died for overstepping boundaries, under CBK’s tenure but Mahinda’s a bit of a thug and I wouldn’t count on the same sort of luck continuing. Does anyone know if he really was in prison for three months a few decades ago on a murder charge?

Ranil’s government:

1. Will have reasonably clear economic policies, the TNA and SLMC don’t really count in the same way the JVP does. They’re more like joy-riders e.g. they’re never going to lead waves of protest marches on the government or try to force someone’s hand on policy with a fast-to-death of a Buddhist monk or two
2. Likely to push for peace settlement
3. Corruption will be on a much grander scale but we will have something to show for it at the end – think Mahaweli, Mahapola, Gam Udawa, EPZs etc.
4. Death of journalists and other boundary over-steppers - Ooh, well the UNP was Premadasa’s party and Sirisena Cooray’s back in the game and SB will be too – need I say more? I think though that marginal loss of freedom of speech is acceptable if it means we get a better economy as a result.
5. Maithri and Ranil Wickremasinghe are a far cuter couple to watch together than Mahinda and his wife. They get frivolous points.

In a fuddle

2005-09-23T13:42:00.000-07:00

I propose to start a new party with political intent as of date. We will have no colour, no symbols and no secret handshakes. It's not as batty as it may seem because it will all be in the miiiind, do you see?

Here are the main objectives:
1. looking good
2. minding your own business

This is not even half as simplistic as it looks : Looking good and minding one's own business will solve over 85% of the problems we face on a daily basis. Whether in terms of the global economy or in our personal lives.

On the importance of minding your own business - Sri Lanka's in the middle of an about-to-be-insanely-violent election process and minding one's own business will prove to be of the utmost importance - trust me. Remember also, that if the US had just minded its own business in the first place, they wouldn't have had 9/11; London wouldn't have had all those bombs and maybe New Orleans wouldn't have been such a developing nation mess-fest.

On the importance of looking good - well, I can't believe have to explain this really!!! This is how bad it is in Sri Lanka. In the blue/ red corner we have a man with a dead fish on his face. He's palled up with two disreputable men that my mother would never let me bring home. Ever. Then in the green corner there's a somewhat poncy, lipstick wearing elitist with his paunchy buddy on the other.

Internationally of course there's the fabulously handsome President Bush, dashing Prime Minister Blair and the beefy Senator, Schwarzenegger. Don't you agree that if they looked good, it wouldn't be such a chore to listen to them spout the drivel that they do? Imagine Uma Thurman chatting about Keneysian econmic theory or Angelina Jolie waxing eloquent about refugees (oh wait.. she does that already). Anyway - you get my drift.

Back to my new party - amongst our key deliverables will be to let people get about the city withoutbeing stuck in what has become a common-place traffic jam. The economy needs to function. We need people to get about their business during the day and go home to their families in the night - that won't happen if they can't go for meetings and are stuck in traffic for three to four hours in the evenings. So no more strikes, rallies or silly ten day marches. Nada.

Another important deliverable will be to ban all trishaws, motorcycles, buses and vans from hereon. If we have lots of excess vehicles once this comes into effect I propose that SLAID (Sri Lanka's Assistance or Industrialised Dimwits)ships them off to New Orleans and the surrounding areas. They need it more than we do right now.

Excess drivers of the vans, buses etc. - will be shipped off as cheap labour to China and India. It's one way to get the dollars flowing inward.

As for a name for this party.... I'm stumped. I have four options so far; 1. Sri Lanka Superficial Party 2. Jathika Lassana Urumaya 3. Janatha Prashna Visandhuma Pakshaya 4. Eksath Komala Pakshaya but nothing's really getting me excited. I can't think why.

I'm just going to sit in a corner until its all a little clearer.